I was fifteen...yeah, just fifteen and a cherry. Mary lived down the block. She was fourteen but she had a pair of tits on her like you wouldn't believe. It was a hot muggy day in July, four years ago now but I remember it like it was yesterday. I was home alone...my old man was working, my two sisters were out somewhere...no mother...she took off with some guy when I was six and ain't been seen since. I was sitting in the living room groping myself, trying to decide if I was ready for another jerkoff session. I was...those days two-three times a day was the norm. I started to zip down when there was a loud rap on the door. I pushed the drapery aside and peered out the window. It was Mary...she saw me and stuck her tongue out at me. Sighing, I zipped up and opened the door.
"Hi, Jimmy!" she said, cheerfully. "How come the door is closed when it's a hundred and ten in the shade?"
I shrugged. "Trying to keep the fuckin' heat out...that's how come." I wondered what her reaction would be if I told her I needed the privacy so I could jerk off. "Watcha been doing?" I asked her, unable to keep my eyes off her tits.
"Frying my ass off waiting for you to open the damn door. Are you gonna let me in or do you wanna come out and fry with me?"
* * *
I pushed the screen door open, hitting her smack on her tits. She didn't seem to notice. "Come on in...it's cooler." Her left tit brushed my arm as she went by, causing instant movement in my groin area.
"This dump ain't exactly air conditioned," she said, frowning. "Shit, not even a fan."
"We're lucky to have the damn house with the salary my old man makes. Do you wanna coke or something?"
She squeezed my arm. "Something, Jimmy, but no coke. You sure have hard muscles. Do you lift weights or what?"
"Ain't got no weights to lift. I do push-ups, you know...sit-ups too every night before I go to bed."
"You do, huh? I'd sure like to see that bed," she said with a wide grin on her face.
My mouth dropped open in surprise. Those days I may have been a little naive but I wasn't dumb. "You serious?" I asked her, grinning back.
Her answer was to grab me in the crotch...hard. I nearly shit. "Let's go!" I said, so excited I had to choke the words out. The thought of getting my first piece of pussy made my swoon. God, would I know how to do it? I wondered. I sure as hell didn't want her to know I was still a cherry.
In my bedroom, she dropped her shorts and pulled her tight-fitting blouse off...no bra or panties underneath. I stared at her naked body...a light colored fuzz covered the entrance to many of my fantasies.
"Quit ogling! You've seen naked girls before, haven't you? I've heard that you and Katie have been making out."
"Huh? Katie? Yeah, sure, lots of times," I said, lying. I hadn't even kissed Katie, a gal who lived across the street from me, much less fucked her. I popped out some of the buttons on my shirt in my haste to get it off, then pushed down my shorts and underwear together. Naked, I stood there, hands on hips, to let her do some ogling...and she did, as she lay on the bed with her hands under her head and her legs spread out wide.
"You're big, Jimmy, really big. I ain't never seen one so big before except for Tom maybe. Are you sure you're only fifteen?"
"Fifteen and a half. You've seen Tom naked...your brother?"
"Just once...one day last week. He was taking off his swimsuit in his bedroom and the door was partially open. He didn't know I saw him. Course it wasn't hard like yours is but it sure was big. Well come on before your sisters come home."
I jumped on the bed and rolled over on top of her, quickly starting to nibble on one of her tits. I was sure that all girls expected this.
"Ouch! Damn it! Don't bite...you gotta do it gentle like."
I was embarrassed...for a second. I stopped with the teeth and used my tongue only while reaching down with a hand, trying to guide myself into her.
"Not yet! I swear, Jimmy, don't you know anything? You gotta work on me awhile first so I can...you know? None of that bunny stuff. Didn't Katie ever tell you?"
"What? How...Oh God...Nooooooo!"
My first experience had turned out to be a disaster! I shot off all over her pussy and stomach before I had been able to get the head of my dick into her. I'll never forget how mad she got. She shoved me off her and ran into the toilet, swearing all the way.
I never got another chance with Mary. For awhile, when I would see her I would say something like, "How about giving me another go with you?" She would smile and shake her head. I finally gave up. In the meantime I started to date Katie. If Mary had thought I made out with her, maybe I could, I hoped. However, while she went along with some heavy necking, if I just touched her breast lightly, she would push my hand away. She had to be a virgin, I decided. How else could she have possibly resisted my advances? I had, after all, been voted the best-looking guy in our sophomore class, beating out Tom, Mary's brother, by only two votes. I was the star of our basketball team. Was I pretty cocky those days? You bet I was...but I was still a cherry!
I took Katie to the Junior Prom. We rode there in Tom's car and Mary was his date. I thought it was a little odd but decided maybe Mary hadn't been asked by any guy so she got Tom to take her. Tom never seemed to date any of the girls in our class. The four of us stuck pretty close together. We'd switch partners dancing. Just before midnight Tom suggested we split and get something to eat.
Mary and Katie chattered constantly in the restaurant. Tom and I talked about plans for the summer. The girls excused themselves to go to the rest room. Tom offered me a cigarette. "Don't smoke," I said, "and you really shouldn't either. I'll bet your gymnastics coach doesn't know that you do."
He lit the cigarette and sighed, while shaking his head. "No, he doesn't. I'd be off the team if he did. I don't smoke much, only when I'm feeling a little nervous."
"Nervous? Now? How come?"
He shrugged, then chuckled. "Because of you, Jim. When was the last time we've been alone together like we are now?"
"I make you nervous? The last time...hell, I don't know. You seem to have your own group of friends and..."
"Have you ever made out with Mary, Jim? You can tell me if you have. I won't care."
Interrupting me with a question like that blew my mind. "No, never!"
After all, I actually hadn't.
"Then you're probably the only one on the block who hasn't. I know Mary and how much she loves to mess around."
"Tom, I've never admitted this to any of the other guys but I'm still a cherry."
He laughed. "That makes me feel good because I thought I was the only one, I swear."
"Who was a virgin...cherry?
He nodded. "It's funny to hear you calling it that. I thought only girls were called cherries."
"Whatever. Do you mind if I ask you why you took Mary tonight when you probably could have had your pick of any of the girls in our class?"
He released a deep sigh and ran a hand through his hair. "I'd kinda like to talk to you about that, Jim. Do you think maybe after we drop the girls off...unless you have plans with Katie?"
"What plans? I haven't been able to get to first base with her. Sure, we can talk if you wanna."
"Great! Then you have tried to make out with Katie?"
"Yeah, like I drop an hand on her tit and she pushes it away...if you can call that trying. Tom, I don't get it. You're great looking...shit, you almost beat me out in that bullshit vote they took on best-looking. I've seen you in the showers. You're built like fucking Michelangelo's David except you've got a bigger dick. You should be able to...shit, here come the girls."
"Did you think we got lost?" Mary asked.
"Yeah, I was about to send the waitress in after you," Tom said. "I guess we can take off now."
Tom dropped me off with Katie in front of her house. I kissed her good night by her door. When I tried to kiss her again, she turned away from me. My lips slid across her cheek. "I had a wonderful time, Jimmy," she said. "I hope...I mean I wish you did too."
"Yeah, I did, Kate girl. I..."
"Don't call me that, please!" she hissed.
"Kate? I think it is the first time I ever did. Shit, you shouldn't be so sensitive."
"And you swear too much too, you know?"
I sighed. "Good night, Katie...I'll be seeing you around." I decided right then that I would never date her again. Who needed a weird broad like her, I thought, as I glanced down the street. Tom was leaning up against his car so I walked over to him.
"How did it go?" he asked. "Were you able to cop a feel?"
"I've had it with her, Tom. She got pissed off because I called her Kate and then pissed off again when I said shit. So, did Mary say she enjoyed herself tonight?"
"She said yes but she's sure the girls will be kidding her because of me taking her...like she couldn't get a date. Actually, I was the one who asked her to go with me, Jim. I've never had a date yet, you know?"
"No, I didn't know. Just what is your problem, kid? Are you shy or something?"
He pulled out his cigarettes, dropping them. I bent over to pick them up just as he did...our heads bumped. "Oh shit, sorry," I said, rubbing my forehead.
"My fault...I dropped them. Can we maybe sit in the car?"
He walked around to the driver's side. I tried to get in but the door was locked. I slid in when he opened it. He lit his cigarette. I watched him take quick deep drags and exhale the smoke out of his nose. I waited. He had a deep frown on his face. He glanced at me nervously with a forced smile. "This is hard for me Jim...Christ, you can't imagine how hard."
There had been something in the back of my mind brewing ever since he had said he wanted to talk to me, but I wasn't sure what it was. Now I knew. In fact I was sure. I decided to make it easier for him. "You're gay, huh?"
He had just taken a puff on his cigarette. He choked and tears came to his eyes. "My God...how did you know?! Am I that obvious?"
I shook my head and patted him on the shoulder. "No way, Tom...no way in hell. I wouldn't have thought that of you in a million years before tonight. It's just that...well, some of the things you said, didn't say, and then just now how hard it was for you. It's okay with me, Tom boy...I swear. You have a hell of a lot of company from all I have read about it and heard."
"I don't know any others, not a single one."
"So you've never messed around yet?" I asked him, immediately sorry that I had.
"Shit no I haven't! You shouldn't even have to ask me that."
I shrugged and noticed the ash from his cigarette was hanging, about to drop on the seat. "Tom, the ash is..." He flipped it out the open window. "So you don't know yet if you're gonna dig...will, that sort of thing, huh?"
"You're still a cherry, you told me, but do you have any doubts whether or not you're gonna enjoy fucking a girl?"
I chuckled. "Putting it that way, I guess it's the same thing. Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you or anything."
"You haven't, Jim. You have no idea how relieved I feel after finally telling someone. I owe you a lot."
"Is there any particular reason why you chose me to tell it to?"
"A bunch of reasons, Jim. Ever since we were little kids and we used to play cops and robbers and games like that...remember how I always wanted to be on your side?"
He looked at me, waiting for an answer. Actually I didn't remember but I nodded, figuring it would make him feel better.
"Christ, how I used to fantasize about you back then. You would get hurt or something and I would take care of you." He grinned sheepishly. "I mean I sure didn't know why, of course, but I've always had this thing for you. It really hurt when we got in high school and you seemed to get involved with different friends than I had. I was so damn happy when Mary suggested we take you and Katie to the prom with us. So I decided tonight was gonna be the night...if the time seemed right, I was gonna tell you."
"When did you know? I mean how old were you?"
"Fourteen, I think...maybe even thirteen. I know my fantasies about you began to change. I was having different thoughts on how I would like to take care of you...if you catch my meaning."
I did. Oh boy, I thought...trouble coming. Or was it really trouble? I thought about Mary and Katie...frustration. The previous summer I was hitchhiking one time and an older guy picked me up. He offered me five bucks if "you'll let me swing on you." I thought it was a peculiar way of putting it but I had caught his meaning. I turned him down but I could have let him. He was a stranger and I would have never seen him again. But Tom...shit, I knew him so well...his sister...
"Well?"
"What?"
"The fact that I wanted to take care of you in a different way. Right now I've got a hard-on just thinking about it."
I shook my head back and forth while blowing air out of my mouth. "I don't know, Tom...I don't know. It's just not my..."
"You'll probably go home and jerk off thinking about how you wished you could have made out with Katie. What's the difference? You wouldn't have to do anything."
"You're offering to give me head, huh?"
"Crudely put, but yes. Deal?"
"Christ! I can't believe this!" I tried to imagine what it would be like but it was almost impossible. How would he feel afterwards? Or act? Or me, for that matter? Would he hate me? Would I hate him? Would I care? Shit! "Where? We can't do anything here...damn street light."
"You mean you're gonna let me?!"
"Why not? I'm curious."
"We can park in front of your house. It's dark there."
"Then move it. I've got a hard-on thinking about it too."
"You're kidding!"
I was. In fact I wondered if I could even get it up at all. Tom drove the car the short distance to my house and turned off the lights. The house was dark...everyone would be sleeping, I knew. I braced myself and thought back to the time on my bed with Mary. Tom's hand on my crotch quickly broke my reverie.
"You were lying. It isn't..."
"Actually Tom, I gotta take a leak. Hang on a minute...I'll go to the side of the house." I did and pissed a quart. Now, maybe, I thought, as I walked back to the car, not bothering to zip up. Even in the dark Tom noticed and shoved a hand in before I could close the door. Surprisingly, it didn't take long...I was hard as a rock. "Christ, Tom, let me get my damn pants down! I don't wanna mess up everything." He moved back a little, grinning, then was back on me again in a flash. I remember wanting to ask him if he wanted me to warn him before I shot off but even if I had, he probably wouldn't have stopped doing what he was doing. In any event it was over in less than two minutes. Tom stayed right at it. It was a fantastic feeling for me, much better than jerking off. Not ever having had any pussy, I was going to have to wait to make a comparison with it. Finally, Tom pulled away and took out a hanky. After giving me a quick glance, he pulled out a cigarette and lit it with some difficulty. His hands were shaking. I pulled up my pants and zipped up.
"Well, aren't you going to say anything?"
"It was good, Tom...felt great."
"I guessed that. You nearly pulled my hair out."
"Sorry...didn't realize."
"I know. It was good for me too."
"I'm glad." How had it been good for him? I wondered. Could he have possibly shot off too without..."Maybe you wanna jerk off or something. Go ahead...it won't bother me."
Tom laughed out loud. "Jim boy, I'll probably jerk off a thousand times thinking about this night but not now, not in front of you."
Incredible, I thought...shy about something like that but not the other thing. "Whatever. I just thought..."
I know. What are your feelings about me now, Jim? Be honest, please."
"No change," I said, shrugging. "Truth."
"Thanks...I believe you. Any chance of an encore some time?"
"I told you it was great."
So it's yes then?"
"Damn it, yes!"
If the publisher had not misplaced the several bios floating around for Mr. Concilio -- you would know more than the fact that he has appeared in the pages of SOTT many previous issues. According to John -- life is a little crazy at the moment.
For more stories by John Concilio, click here.
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